I have been walking in high heels since I was at least 12 years-old. Over those years I have found myself thinking to myself about the art of walking in heels. I have compiled a list of the most common thoughts that I have when I am walking in high heels.
Men do not understand the art and the difficulty of walking in high heels, and if you are a man and you do understand, props to you, we should probably be friends.
Anyway, ladies, here are my most common thoughts while walking in heels, so maybe if you are thinking the same things while you are strutting your stuff, you do not think you are absolutely crazy; men, if you are reading this, you will be enlightened.
1. “My legs look killer in these heels!”
2. “Don’t fall, don’t fall!”
3. “My butt looks amazing!”
4. “Do I really have to walk down this cobblestone street?”
5. “Am I walking correctly in these?”
6. “I should be a model! I am owning this hallway right now!”
7. “Heel, toe; heel, toe…”
8. “Can you like, not throw such big pieces of rock salt?”
9. “This is a good workout!”
10. “Seriously dude, what are you staring at?”
11. “Where is the nearest bench?”
12. “Holy crap, the atmosphere is totally different up here!”
13. “Wow. I really am short…I am finally as tall as my friends!”
15. “Is my dancing still sexy?”
16. “Cant wait to take these off!”
17. “That girl looks like a dinosaur walking in heels; I should teach a “how to walk in heels class”.
18. “Am I making too much noise?”
19. “How far away is this bar?”
20. “If I fall, how will I play cool?”
21. “This should be a sport, or an olympic game…
22. “This is actually hard!”
23. “Posture, posture!!”
24. “Don’t bend the knees too much!”
25. “I wonder what I would look like running….”
26. “Never mind, no I don’t…”
27. “Do guys actually notice women walking in heels?”
28. “I am never wearing heels after this!”
29. “Who am I kidding, I live in heels.”
30. “These heels aren’t tall enough.”
31. “Are my boobs bouncing too much?”
If you have ever had any of these thoughts, you probably were wearing heels. So girls, do not fret about thinking crazy thoughts in your high heels, just rock them…and if you do fall…definitely play it cool, brush yourself, off, laugh at yourself and get back into your heels because they will come flying off.